Seek First To Understand Then To Be Understood
I’m still reading about Randal on google. I know it sounds a wee bit exaggerating but I really think I have just been inspired by Dr. Randal Pinkett. Hmmm, PINKett… my favourite colour. But hey, that has nothing to do with the new found respect I have for this man. *lol*
Now back to the 5th habit - Seek First To Understand Then To Be Understood.
Randal mentioned this to his new team mate, a rude and extremely bossy blonde(don’t remember her name) when she asked his opinion about her behavior. She was being so defensive all the time. She has no respect for her team mates and constantly challenged the authority of her project manager. I thinks she is the nemisis of her team. She destructed the team’s dynamic and hence causing the team defeat. She is the problem and apparently Donald Trump recognized that. Soon after that, she was fired. A right decision, Donald!
My mind raced back to the instances I thought I behaved like her. Maybe not to her extend but yes, there were occasions when I was so busy to defend myself and hence fail to understand the core of the problem. I wanted people to understand me, from my point of view and not theirs. Now I realized I could be a pain to deal with. But learning and perfecting ourselves are the whole purpose of living, isn’t it? There is still time to change.
This 5th habit is all about creating a win/win situation and establishing one’s influential power. To me, it means more like that. It opens up my eyes to see the darker side of me. It reminds me to practise the active listening skill. Sad to say, people these days don’t listen with open heart but with pre-judgement. Are you?
While it’s hard to change our attitude towards certain things, it’s worth to remember to always seek to understand then to be understood!
Meanwhile, I sense an urgent need to complete the 8th Habit of Highly Effective People which is sitting untouched on my book shelf.
To a more intellectual self, here I come! 
